It seems like a crazy dream. I've been wanting to care for medically fragile children for a very long time. I started taking the courses way back in 1995 when I first became divorced. I thought that it might be a good way to bring in some extra income and still be available for my own children. Then I found out that I had to be divorced for a minimum of one year. I dropped the courses thinking that I would finish later.
Then I met and married Craig. Between the two of us, we had eight kids, and the number of children in a household are limited for foster care. So, I needed to wait until at least three of my own children were above the age of eighteen, and I had to have a spare bedroom. This all happened about the time that Linda moved out a couple of years ago.
So Craig and I signed up for the classes and travelled to Tyler about 60 miles away twice a week for about six weeks. When we thought that we were ready for the home inspection, the worker came into our house and saw some wrinkled wallpaper in the master bathroom. Immediately he told us that the house would never pass.
Just think how disappointed Craig and I were, knowing that our house was very old and needed a lot of work; more work than we had either the time or the money for.
Over the next couple of years, we finished rooms, sheetrocked and painted, completed little projects here and there until finally we thought we might be ready again. To our dismay, the classes that we took all summer long were no longer valid. One only has a year from finishing the classes to get licensed and it had been several.
I called a different agency hoping that things might be just a little bit easier if I chose one a little bit closer to home. I begged them to come out to the house first, to see if in their opinion things were close enough to proceed. Good news. They encouraged us to retake all the classes and get just a couple of things in order.
It took us eight hours a day, every Saturday in May to take all of the classes. We needed little courses here and there off the internet, updated our CPR, and had to find proof of all the little things like insurance on the car, our household income, etc., etc,. etc.
We had a hard time finding anyone who would do the fire inspection. Everyone that we talked to told us they didn't do them. Frustrated, I called a few more numbers and finally was able to contact the Fire Chief of Edgewood who came out immediately (that very day, in fact) and got us passed.
Then I forgot that Ryan had turned eighteen and needed finger printing, and a couple of other things, but finally, we felt we were once again ready.
I made the appointment for the 4 1/2 hour interview with all the family in the home.
And we passed! Finally!!!
And what overwhelming emotions that hit me by surprise. First, I felt relief, then was overcome with utter exhaustion. I started worrying about whether I would be able to take care of a medically fragile child or not. I thought of all the date nights and wondered if they were finished. I worried whether I would have to give up my callings at church, then wondered if I would now become inactive. I thought of Kelly, my after school job. Would I be able to continue taking care of her, or would I have to cut back drastically, or even quit all together? Such emotions I had not expected.
Its been a couple of days, and I'm feeling better again. I know I can do the job. I've been caring for medically fragile children for 22 years now. What makes me think I can't do it all of a sudden? Thinking about hiring someone to care for the child if they are not able to attend church has put my mind at ease about my callings. And Kelly's mom and I have come up with some backup plans "just in case," of what, I'm still not sure. But at last, my concerns are fading and once again I am excited to welcome a child into my home that needs the care that I can provide.
God gave me a little single talent. Would I hide this little talent under a stone, and return to Him with just one talent? Or will I make this talent grow, and bring back to him twice as many, and have Him say to me, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant." I want to do all I can with the talent that God has given me.
